Consistency..

I am fully aware that I need to be more consistent with my blog. I am going to work on adding my blog to my daily routine. I have not finished my D.C. Trip series of stories, I will eventually finish those. I am currently doing some reflecting which is never new with me! I am looking at my life and the people I have in it.  I have some great friends, Sorority Sisters, and family members. I am also looking at the people I have lost contact with in 2009. I have to say it honestly does not hurt. 

There are a lot of people I have been friends with that were only "seasonal." Meaning we were not meant to be friends for a long time. Either I needed them for a period in my life, or they needed me! As I sit and think about the seasonal friends of 2009; I had some great times with them and I wish them the best with everything. 

 On a lighter note, I had the opportunity to go to my old stomping grounds North Carolina... The end of October for homecoming. I had a ball, but came to the realization there are some things I no longer want to participate in. As a child I did childish things, when I became an adult I put away those childish things.  I look at life in a different view, therefore I am totally over having a new outfit, stunting, and trying to make my life seem like it is so much better than everyone else life.  However, I did enjoy myself in NC, and I had a great time! 

* This is all I really have to share for now, I am going to work on trying to update on a daily basis. 

D.C. Part 2

I am a pretty observant person, I always take in everything that is going on around me. I love D.C. and I am especially grateful for the experiences and eye openers that I had while in D.C. 

We have all since exchanged numbers, we are still in D.C. and we are prepping to go and enjoy our final night. My linesister, myself, and my girl are all getting dressed we are getting ready to go grab something to eat, and then the rest is up in the air. 

I failed to mention someone who was on the trip, because I did not think he was that important. However for this part of the story he is. John (who is a late aged twenty something gay man who rode down with us) John knocks on my door, and wants to know where we are going, and what are plans are for the evening. We tell him, we are not to sure but we are going to grab a bite to eat.  C. is the name of the guy who I told you about earlier. We tell John that we are going to more than likely go out and eat with C, and his friends. He says cool, and asks if he can come with. We all agree he can and out we go. 

   We enter the restaurant we are all seated at the table. C, his boys my girls and John. C, of course sat across from me! he and I are engaged in conversation about life, school, and dreams. I notice John, glancing at me in a weird manner, I really do not care about how he is looking at me. I continue my conversation! we prepare to go to some fraternity party, John is now rushing us all out of the restaurant because he has to go back to the hotel. ( side eye) * my thought is why are we being rushed out to bring you back?* Whatever!!! we drop John off at the hotel and end up at a hotel down the street from where we are all staying.  

We all sit in the lobby and talk, and laugh at the randomness that is going on around us. I get up to go to the bathroom and my Linesister is on my heels walking to the bathroom with me. She looks at me and says I think there is some down low shit going on here! Huh, (blank stare) what do you think is going on? She says John wants C!!!!! You have C's attention and he is mad...  He really wants C. Why would he want C? I ask my LS do you think C has gay tendencies? She says if so they are not visible. Now I am floored, I do not know how to look at the situation.  We go back to the hotel lobby, I sit down and I am quiet! I have nothing to say, I am trying to process this situation. Is he gay? or is he attracted to men? It does not matter, I do not want anything to do with this, or him. I am not sure what he wants.

D.C. Part 1

       Last September my Senior year of college, I decided to attend the CBC ( Congressional Black Caucus)   I always have and always will have a crazy love affair with D.C... I freaking LOVE D.C.... While attending the CBC, they have a job/career fair that is going on downstair in the main lobby. I get a call from my Aunt telling me to come meet her down there. I go down stairs and I meet her.  We walk from table to table, meet people, Network and get business cards.  Of course she runs into people she knows from NC.. She introduces me to this young man! We shake hands smile and thats it. ( NO CONNECTION) 

    In the beginning this guy and I have no connection from that first meeting. My aunt somehow gets some tix for a LL Cool J party at LOVE. My God Sis is underage, which means she is not going to get in. I  make some calls, trying to establish my party network which is important in one's 20's. and my boy says he cant get her in because she is not of age; he can get us in without tickets.  Clearly a fail.. I didn't get to go any of the hot parties during the CBC!!!!!!  Disappointed was a n understatement.. I am now ready to go back to NC. 

My Line Sister who lives in D.C. calls me and says she is on her way to my hotel!!! I cant wait to see her.  I get fly, Prepped because she always has something up her sleeve for fun.  I tell my God Sis to get ready.. My LS gets to the hotel I go down to meet her in the lobby.  The lobby is packed with nothing but Black people with their best on. I run into my aunt, who is talking to a group of young guys.. ( Cougar) I sashay over to where my aunt is with my LS, and God Sis. We all engage in a conversation.  The guys say they are about to go get something to eat would we like to join them.. YESSSS!!!!!! We go out to eat, we engage in some deep conversations:  Black community, education, Sorority/Fraternity........... 

We leave the restaurant and go to a local hotel. ( Not my HOTEL)  I am kind of digging this dude James, his whole vibe is on point! He is 24 years old, owns his own business he can speak a proper sentence, he well educated! I like him, at the end of the night we end up exchanging numbers.. Of Course my girls exchanged numbers with his friends. 

 

Have my recent posts been boring???

I am well aware that I have probably turned some of you off, and have caused others to be bored. I am a working young adult who is trying to have a life.. I think of so much to blog about, but I rarely get the time to write about.  I am currently looking for some blog ideas. Please comment and tell about some things you would like me to read and research. I look forward to your ideas...

~ One Love~

Its been a long time...

Its been a long time, I should not have left you.. without a dope post to read!!!! Forgive me... 

 Life has been pretty interesting these last couple of weeks.. I am currently sick as hell!!!! I am taking the day of off work to get better. I feel like shit!!!! I do not have H1N1 I have a bad cold. Now that I am back in Connecticut I am spending my free time traveling to the City and working. Also I a dodging low lifes. You know the people who are not doing shit with themselves, the same ones I left here in Connecticut four years ago. It is like they never change, because they have not. They are stuck in the same mindset. It is kind of sad. The girls are still chasing the whack drug dealers. And the guys have two or three more kids. 

Now I am not saying I am better than these people, but I am keeping my distance; it is very easy to fall in the trap of settling. I refuse to settle, which is why I am staying on my grind! Connecticut is not permanent, and I plan to be out of here the summer of 2010 if not sooner.  I am looking at Boston,  D.C., Philly, North Carolina, and some other places. There is just something great about having your own spot/getaway. Where the only people who come are the ones you invite. Thats just my opinion.  

Anywho... I need to get out of the house, it is semi- driving me crazy.. I promise I will blog a lot more... I have some good posts running through my head, so do not worry they are coming soon. I will not leave you all like this agian..  

I moved...

I have officially relocated back to Connecticut.. Forgive me for not blogging as often as I should, I have hectic days. I am volunteering and doing some other work.  I currently cannot complain about life. I am enjoying my life, and I am living it to the fullest. I am trying to take advantage of every opportunity that comes my way. You never know why certain things happen the way they do. I am learning to no longer ask  questions. I am becoming a "go with the flow" girl! I have not decided if that is good or bad.  I hope it is a good thing. Of course if you know me I do not flow with stupid ish. Sensible decisions are the only decisions that I make!!! 

 It has suddenly hit me that my peers have either gone back to undergrad, or has started their first week of graduate courses.  It is an interesting feeling not currently being in school. Well, I have moved on from that period in my life. I am over the fact that I am currently not in graduate school. I refuse to continue to dwell on it. What is that going to do for me?? The next couple of months of my life I am going to look into who I am and what I want to do. And what is going to make me happy. I am excited and ready for what is next!!!!  Life is what you make it... I am in my prime, I have not really started yet. Enjoy your life and live it to the fullest. 

You Did What?

We all have so many skeletons in our closet. We all have secrets that we would never tell maybe our best friend. In todays society people are doing just about anything to get  by in this world. I believe I have written on this topic once before, but this time I am going to go more in depth. 

Love is a beautiful thing, it is made for two people to enjoy, have trials, and ups and downs. When do you tell your significant other about your past? Or do you keep your past to yourself? Is it ok to tell this person about things you "tried" in college? Or should you keep this to yourself? Or if you keep it to yourself are you not being honest with your significant other? When is telling too much too much? Where does one draw the line? 

How do you know if your significant other is hiding things from the past, that you know nothing about? Would you be mad if you found out? Its the past,  why get mad??? 

i want your opinions............

Allow me to be BLUNT!!!!!

       

As of May 9, 2009 I became a graduate of Bennett College in Greensboro, NC. I had plans dreams and goals, I wanted certain things to fall in order and happen. I should be preparing for graduate school; however I am not attending "Graduate School" in the Fall. ( I will eventually get my Masters, just not in the Fall.) I am deeply hurt, and perturbed by these events.  A Master's degree does not make a person! I know this!!!  I am currently interning for a company who has played me money wise; I learned a lot and I will not allow anyone to BS me.. .I may be young but I am an adult. Needless to say my last day with the company is tomorrow.  At this point I dodge the question when people want to know what I am doing since I have graduated. Honestly I rather not talk to people about what I want to do; Or what I wanted to do. Peoples reactions and comments sometimes throw me for a loop.

    I know it is horrible that I really cannot keep in touch with my close friends I recently graduated with. I find myself keeping a distance, and not returning phone calls or text messages because I feel as if we do not have anything in common anymore. I am going to be honest this ISH is tough. My dad keeps saying " stop looking at everyone else, and comparing yourself to everyone else."  It is kind of hard, sometime you have to take a look around you and see where people are going, and where are you going.  I am a driven person, with a determined spirit; but I feel broken, sometimes when people get to this point they make "stupid" decisions, and never think things through.

      Today I closed a new chapter in my life! I moved all of my belongings out of my apartment. My lease was up, but this was my very first apartment; it was a bitter sweet moment for me. but as I walked out of the apartment for the last time I felt as if I got rid of baggage that I was holding on to I felt a release. This new chapter is crazy for me as it begins... I am in North Carolina living with an aunt but I am debating if I should go back to Connecticut where I am from where my parents reside. CT is a place where people settle and become content with meritocracy.  I am not content with going back there!!!!! I am not ready to live under my parents roof again; I love my mom and dad a lot but I am not ready for that.... Leaving CT was the best thing I did; I went to an HBCU, and accomplished every goal I had, and every dream. I let go of my past and lived my life, without regret. I know I say I do not want to go back to CT, and I am sure you are reading this, and saying "don't go back," but I do not want to stay with my aunt too long where I feel like a burden. I do not want to go out on a limb and sign a lease for an apartment that I cannot afford. 

 So I wonder am I allowing this small stepping stone ( Situation) to destroy me???  Is it that deep? Or am I making it more than what it is? Is my ego playing a role because I do not want "any" job?   

Sorry if this post is all over the place, my mind is scattered, I would love to hear people's opinions and thoughts on this. * I am aware that I am the only one who can make a decision,  I am simply asking for one's thoughts and opinions on this situation. 

IM Not Sure how to approach this...

I have two major issues I would like to write about................

Tattoos you love them, you hide them, you show them. Tattoos are an expression of ones self, who and what a person is. Something they love, a quote they live by. Something a person went through. Why do people act as if tattoos are so negative? I understand it is permanent ink on ones body, but is it that serious? I am guilty of having several tattoos I actually love tattoos. They are all hidden except for one tattoo which is a butterfly on my inner wrist. A piece of jewelery can cover the tattoo up, but one would still be able to notice it. A lot of people do not understand the meaning of a butterfly, but it represents something you went through in life, and how you came out a stronger person. I am curious what is the big deal about tattoos? Why do people get them, keep them for a while, then decide they want to get them removed?

* Discuss*

Dreams are REAL!!!

For a while I have been thinking about my goals in college, that all came true. How did I get this dreams to come true? I wrote them down, looked at them and prayed about them. So many of us have goals, however we do not follow through. (NOT GOOD) We (including myself) have got to learn how to get goals accomplished. Talking about what you want to do will always be a dream, because you have never placed it in writing. When you place your goals in writing its like something magical happens, you become a step closer to making your dreams become a reality. Write the goals down and pray. Ask God to give you the strength each and everyday to work hard toward that goal. The harder you work towards the goal the easier it will be for you to get there.



There are so many dream killers out here it is crazy. You cannot share your dreams, goals or thoughts with everyone. Sometime family members can be dream killers, I know it is scary to think that, but it is true. Family members can be HATERS to... Know and understand your worth, and do not allow anyone to tell you, you are less than what you really are. Everything in life is about confidence. How confident are you when you walk out the door? Confidence always sells people, they do not have to know that you may not fully have everything together. If you can sell yourself and or product people may invest in you, or your product. You never know who is watching, and what they are watching for. For now on Live life and Love it!!! I'm sure we all have curve balls, and speed bumps and life, take it as a lesson learned and enjoy who you are...



With all of this said I hope this really helps someone.... .Life is so much fun when you know and understand your worth.. I am preparing myself for a bigger picture, and I am starting with my goals...



Remember: Follow your dreams, or you will work for somebody that did!!



* Be blessed, and enjoy your day.

The Other Girl

So the other night my girls and I sat down to talk about relationships, its one of our rituals. We talk about where we have been, life, how we felt, and what got us where we are. I guess as we get older this will be a more common factor. I write all of this because my small crew of friends do not share their business with everyone. When we talk, it is highly confidential, its just between us. I cannot NOT share this story..

Carmen (Not her real name) is a great friend of mine, we are around the same age she has been through more relationship issues than me, but I enjoy our "talks" because everything we talk about makes sense. About two years ago Carmen met this guy TY who was cool, he had a great sense of humor and their personalities matched well together. Well Carmen and TY got pretty serious, she was his ride or die.... She would do anything for him, because the level they were on she knew she could do whatever he needed. As time went on Carmen and Ty developed a strong bond. Life went on, and they stopped messing around but they still kept in touch if Carmen needed anything he was willing to give it to her and vice versa. If one of Ty's other chicks needed something and Carmen knew it she would play the "cousin" role, or "sister" role, and would help the other female.....

After we had this conversation I was a little taken back, I'd never judge my girl, however I would have NEVER EVER been able to play the role Carmen played. It blows my mind that you never know who the "other" girl is.

SN: I choose to place this pic of L. Hill because she talks about being the other girl in Miseducation Of Lauryn Hill..

* Discuss*

What are we doing?

As an African American woman I try my hardest to support all African American owned businesses. I have to admit it can be difficult at times, because I do not always agree with the foolishness we put out to the public, but if it's black owned I try to support it. What would the world be like if black owned businesses no longer existed? We have to support out own people. With this being said, I am sad that Vibe magazine will no longer exist. Vibe magazine brought more than hip-hop, it introduced some of the world's most influential African- American journalist. I am guilty I did not purchase every copy of Vibe Magazine, however if I knew they were suffering the way they were, I would have subscribed. We have to save "US" in this economy, because if we don't what will our future hold?


*Think On It*

Birthday Weekend

June 19th Friday was my birthday..... It was a cool birthday honestly, I am an only child so normally I like to do things BIG. Not this year, I kept it cool, and relaxed... I did the mani/pedi thing... I partied with my homeboy. Saturday I went to Charlotte, did some small shopping, and Sunday I relaxed... It was a good weekend I did not stress, so I am happy about that. Now we are back to Monday and I am in a GREAT mood... Next year will be different for my birthday I plan to take a nice little trip, and be on a beach somewhere....

IS it wrong for me to be upset with certain people who should know and always remember when my birthday is? Or is that somewhat childish? Or is that the only child in me? I am just asking because I am curious... Well I hope my daddy liked his father's day gift.. I hope it was everything he dreamed of.. I got him a gold medallion cross.. He loves crosses, and he's most recent cross something happened to it..

For now on I am going to start leaving inspirational messages on the end of my blogs, to help inspire others, and help others get through the day....

" A goal unwritten is a dream, it becomes a reality when you begin to pursue it."

PS: I don't know what everyone's issue is about being single, I am having sooo much fun being single...

Decisions..

Did you miss me??

 I am serious about this blogging, I am sorry that I have been so distant, I have been doing a lot of work, and preparation for my next step in life. I cannot tell you what I am about to do, but just know I am about to do it big. 

Anywhoo..  I have been living in North Carolina for four years, I am originally from Connecticut, but I moved to NC for college. When I left Connecticut I left everyone I knew there.  Coming to NC was a great experience for me, and its something I will never forget. I have now graduated.  I am preparing myself for my next step and set of goals.

 Where am I going with this you ask?  Well its funny how I have not kept in contact with a lot of people, for the most part there have been very few people I have kept in contact with in CT. About two weeks ago I went home to visit for the weekend, and I unfortunately ran into my ex- boyfriend... He sees me and says " I am going to come and visit you in three weeks"... I think to myself, WHY????? I have been in North Carolina for four years, and you never came to visit, so why now?  A week later I get a phone call from my high school/college ex Boy friend  who says... " I am coming to visit you next week!!" WHY  I ask again????  HE says I just want to come down there and see what it is like. I have never been, and I want to see what kind of opportunities are there. Needless to say they can both come to North Carolina, but I refuse to allow them to stay at my apartment, or see me. Well maybe Ill say hey, but I have left the past, maybe the have not, but that's not my issue.... SN:  These are two different guys....  

PS: I have only dated two guys and these are the two.. I will eventually come up with nicknames for them, so you know who they are...

I have learned this in life.. If Someone is in your past there is a reason for that, If people continue to focus on their past they will never see or understand their future..  It's best to let go, and move on to what's promised for you.... 

How do you feel about your past relationships, friendships? Have you ever had to stop talking to an ex, or a best friend because you were not "there" anymore? Or you were not into the same things?

*Discuss* 

I Know my Destination Im Just not there...

Ok so I am enjoy this post- grad life, however I feel like I don't know how to get where I want to be. I know where I want to be.. The only issue is how do I get there..  As Kanye would say I know my destination.. Im Just not there in the streets. It's crazy how it seems like everyone around me has life taking off for them, and I am actively trying to have my life take off for the positive, but I just cannot seem to get things off the ground.   I am a firm believer that the sky is the limit!!!!!! Im going to get there, and it's going to be great.. Have a great Weekend, and enjoy yourself.. 

Welcome Back.. ( CUe MAse)

I needed a small break.... Or maybe a large break...

So much has happened since I stopped blogging. I graduated from Bennett College For Women, I  am currently interning with a company here in North Carolina. I am preparing for my next step after graduation.  I am back to blogging, about my encounters and the randomness I go through on a day to day basis.  These next couple of months will be crucial and I will be working on making positive moves in my life..    

Food For Thought..

I NEED these for Graduation.. Every "REAL LADY" should have a pair of Christian Louboutin's in her closet.

The Pic on the very top explains my MOOD TODAY: I just want to sit and text on my phone, and read fashion Magazines, with my Shades on!!!

Relationship Advice You need to make it through the Day:

So we all have some hidden skeletons that we NEVER want to talk about. Maybe it was things we did in our teens, or maybe when we were in our twenties. So whatever the "secret" is when do you come out and tell your long time boyfriend, or girlfriend, fiance, or husband/wife about your secrets? Or do you keep these skeletons in your closet? I meant does it really matter if you did these weird things? If this person loves you he/she should not care. ( RIGHT)

Should you tell your potential lover about your past? Or should you keep it your past, and leave it at a don't ask, don't tell basis? When dating or getting ready to get married shouldn't you out everything on the table. Who cares you did whatever years ago; why should it matter or effect your relationship..

Personally I would want to know about skeletons or anything crazy in my fiance, or long time boyfriends past. I do not think there is anything wrong with wanting to know about a persons past. It's important to know who you are dating... This is some Food For Thought I had.. I want to hear your opinion on if you want to know about Your current or lifetime Mates past.

* I am aware that these thoughts may have been slightly random today, but random makes me, me.*

Muah to the readers.. <3

What Kind OF Questions????

 So I have been thinking about when you meet a guy or girl. You have a little conversation at the location, or you have a lot of conversation. Eventually if you are digging this person you two will exchange phone numbers, and continue the conversation, which may lead into a possible date; or it will turn into absolutely nothing.

The other day my friend Rebecca and I were having a conversation about a guy she recently met. Long story short, the man was older, but he had a lot of swag!!! (LOL) She did not find out this mans age until they spoke on the phone. Not only did she find out he was nineteen years older than her, she found out he was married and had a ten year old!!!!!!!!! If Rebbecca would not have taken the time out to ask the questions, she would have never found out this information about him. 

This leads me to a series of questions, and roaming thoughts. What are the proper questions to ask before getting to personal?  How do you ask these questions before offending someone?  A lot of people believe that if one does not ask a question then it will never come out.  I want some feedback about what type of questions to ask; and when is the right time to ask these questions? 

Moving ON.. Did anyone see Harlem Heights this past Monday??

I do not know how I am suppose to feel about BET trying to create reality shows.  I am not a big fan of BET whatsoever, and I do not think Harlem Heights will last more than one season. I really wish someone would create a REAL reality show following African- American collegiate men and women.  I think it is important to show people with a college education on television, where ignorance is not promoted.  ( Ok I am done rambling)

Playing Catch Up

Sorry about the long hiatus... Life was a little crazy, and I am just getting back into the groove of blogging. As you can see I am currently adding and making some changes as promised.

Well I had a "snow day" today, therefore I was unable to run the errands I needed to run for the day. So I sat in the house, and watched "Brown Sugar;" the editing for this movie is terrible, but the actual story line is great. Hip Hop is officially dead, and this is something I truly believe. "Brown Sugar" did make me think about the time I fell in love with Hip Hop.. I remember listening to Queen Latiffa's U-N-I-T-Y Although i was young and maybe 4 0r 5 years old, I would bob my head to the beat... I remember listening to TOTAL from 1996-1998, who could forget that era.

Now this crunk music, and do the stanky leg, is HORRIBLE!!!! I hate it, it makes no sense for people to get record deals with these ridiculous lyrics. Overall its whack, and you cannot even bob your head to a beat, where women are being respected in music. This is sad, and who would have ever thought Hip-Hop would be here.


On a lighter note I spent some time in Charlotte with my friend Danielle, and we had a blast.. I cannot believe I have been in North Carolina for four years, and I have missed the CIAA every year.( SMH) the parties were cool, Danielle and I ended up partying with an older crowd OG's ( for the Slow ones, the original Gangstas) but we had a ball, the grown up crowd got it in for sure.. (LOL) unfortunately I didn't take any pictures, so I don't have any to post, from the weekend. Overall the weekend was a blast, and I look forward to the rest of the week in North Carolina when the snow melts.

Believe IN Yourself.

I am doing some revamping in life, and within this blog.. So I have been gone for a while. I am hoping by next week to have the blog looking different and refreshed. I am refreshed and having fun in life as well. I am enjoying my last semester of Undergraduate studies.
With my revamping I am still going to talk about relationships, but I am going to incorporate real issues that I, and others go through as we endure the age of twenty and beyond. I am going to add links, pictures, and make my blog more exciting. So please stay tuned.. Give me about two weeks from today.. Trust me its going to be good.

This was a GREAT weekend. I did a lot of exploring on who I am, and where I am trying to go. As well as how can I conquer all the goals I have set for myself in life. Trust me I dream big and I want to achieve all the goals I have created for myself. So where is all of this coming from? This weekend I was granted the opportunity to hear Hill Harper speak at a conference; he spoke about so many things, but as always people can talk, but there are keywords that are said that stand out. Harper spoke about achieving dreams and having a ground plan for your life that is written in PENCIL, because you are going to have to erase, start over, and revamp. I couldn't agree more. This made me begin to think where am I going? What is it that I want to do? How am I going to get there? What is going to be my limit and age that I want to get there? Personally I do not like sharing my goals, dreams, and visions with other people. I feel when you tell others what you want to do, it does not happen.

After hearing Harper speak he gave a book he wrote "letters to a young daughter" to the audience, and he autographed each and everyones' copy. Well when it was my turn I introduced myself, as a senior at Bennett College for Women. After my introduction Mr. Harper asked me this "what are your goals, after you graduate?" I said I have plans on going to graduate school, and obtaining my Masters in Speech Pathology, and eventually getting my doctoral degree before I am thirty." He looks at me and says "where have you applied?" I give him my three schools. ( I never share this information, being put on the spot I did) he says where is your heart telling you to go? I looked at him, and stated a school. ________ ( Blank School) He proceeds to say to me it's already done. "Get that Doctorate, I am counting on you, and I have faith in you."

After walking away from Mr. Harper and he continued to sign others books, all I could think was is this where my heart wants me to go? Is this where I am suppose to be? What made me say the school I said? These thoughts continuously ran through my head. I am trying to teach myself how to follow my heart and do what I want to do, without allowing anyone else to alter with what I want to do.

I ask this question do you have a blueprint of your life in your bag, folder, or work desk currently? Have you acheived all your goals in life? If you didn't achieve your goals what stopped you? How can you go back to the drawing board, and start over? Are you or have you followed your heart? Or are you following someones elses dream?

You aggravate ME!!!!

So why are WE never attracted to the people that are attracted to us the most?? So have you ever had a guy/girl like you a lot? But because he/she was not your " CUP OF TEA" How do we explain to people without hurting his/her feelings that we are not attracted to them?

So one of good friends and I were talking the other day, and she was explaining to me about this guy who had a serious love interest in her.For some reason she was not attracted to anything about him. I met the guy and thought he was GREAT for her. I cannot live other peoples lives.. Therefore it really didn't matter what I thought because she was the one who had to date this guy.

Do looks play a major part in a persons mind, when he/she is deciding whether or not they want to pursue a relationship with this individual? Are we as people shallow when it comes to relationships? Should we look beyond all of the Pet Peeves that have been broken, and all the aggravating things this individual has said, and done? Personally ignorance plays a key factor in why I Can Become Aggravated with a Person.... Well I am curious in what others think about Looks, personality, and pet Peeves.

Happy Friday

Allow me to say HAPPY FRIDAY, to everyone..
The weekend is here, and I am sure that some will make it a memroble weekend. I on the other hand will be doing school work, relaxing, and trying to realieve myself from stress. I am thinking about cooking tonight, and perhaps I will go pick up a movie or two. So todays topic is setting standards. I wanna know are men and women setting their standards to high realtionship wise? If we lower our standards will we be able to open ourselves up to a world of dating? So people I meet lately I ask them are thy content with their relationship? Most people say they are not.

Personally I have trouble understanding why ANYONE would want to be in a relationship they are not happy with? If you are unhappy why not move on? You could be missing out on someone who you have a lot of potential to grow with. I have a good male friend who has the potential to make any girl he chooses happy. He is in a stagnet relationship that is not going anywhere, but he chooses to leave his crazy Girlfriend. Are people scared of change when it comes to a relationship? ( MAybe thats the New Excuse) Anyway change is good, and you never know how someone different can change you for the good.

In a relationship you need to meet someone you can grow with, and be happy with....

Happy Friday EVERYONE..


Random Thought: Who saw the notrious movie? I was surprised that the movie recieved ratings so high, Biggie was soooo Disresptful to Women. ( Hip Hops Mogul) So what did Diddy think this movie portrayed??? SMH

Ok so this has been me for the last two weeks, I am trying to meet these deadlines for Graduate school, and this shit is not JOKE!!!! I am STRESSED.. Period, I have been asking teachers for recommendation letters, and they are telling me to write my own letter, and they will sign it. WHAT???? Since when do you write your own recommendation letter.. Whatever I am just going to get it done.. I have another week left, and I will do my best to finish this, and send these applications off.. I am consistently telling myself " I can do all Things through Christ that strengthens me."

I have not left you readers, I miss you all and I have A LOT to talk about... Life has thrown some curve balls, and you will be reading about them soon.

SOS

SAve Our SISTERS....

Ok this is a topic that is minimally being spoken about.  People are not speaking to young ladies about the type of realtionships that are healthy to be in. Love does not equal being slapped kicked, or punched. Regardless of how much money he is giving you.  SO many women cross over is what I call it. It is when you date a man because of his money.  When you cross over to dating a man because he has money and your being a GOLD DIGGER you are vulnerable to a whole new world that you are not used to.

Of course the fame, the money, the bling it all looks and seems good. But  is it worth getting your ass whooped over every night? I am sure there are some drug dealers, athletes, and rappers who do not beat their girls or side chicks. But it does happen.  These men are well aware what you are after. The money signs gleam through your eyes, trust me men are no fool when it comes to gold digging women. Therefore he feels it is no problem to hit you when  you get out of line. This man knows if you walk away tomorrow you got him for his money. So women stay in these unhealthy relationships, because " He Loves ME" which is not true, because if he loved you so much he would never put his hands on you. 

Why isn't anyone talking to these young girls about these type of relationships? Why is it being accepted?  How do we save our sistas, who can be soo much more? There are plenty of men out there who are loving and caring. And that does not mean he has to put his hands on you.  Ladies be more observant, and watch the signs, so you can make sure you are not ever going to subjected to this type of relationship. 

MY Life...

Before I start anything allow me to say happy Founder's day to all my beautiful Sorors of Alpha Kappa Alpha, We are 101 years old..

So lets get started, this particular post I dedicate to all of my friends who have taken advice from another friend about RELATIONSHIPS.. I personally do not agree that others should take relationship advice from friends. How can anyone ask someone what to do, if he/she does not understand a persons true feelings for someone else? I dedicate this post to so many people who have asked others for relationship advice, and are now single because they listened to someone else. When a person looks back on a relationship he/she realizes they should have followed their gut feeling.

I have some friends who are in interesting relationships, we do not date the same guys, and we have TOTALLY different taste. Would it make sense for me to take relationship advice from someone who is in a unstable relationship???

Catchin UP

SO I was gone for a second I had some business to handle.. I am preparing to go back to school tomorrow, so I am packing and finishing last minute things... I have had a lot on my mind to talk about so I am going to try and cover it in this post.

This week U had this revelation, that brought me to reality. I feel as though I have been floating and not preparing myself for the next step in life. Graduation is May 9, 2009. I cannot wait and I am very excited, but I am also trying to prepare myself for the next step after undergrad. This is what came to mind: What makes me or anyone else unique, what makes you or me the best candidate for the job/or grad program? Have you participated in enough activites to show leadership skills? How do you qualify for the next step in life?

How mature have you become since you have been in college? Have you built up a vocabulary that is comparable to your other counter parts? How are your writing skills? Do you have enough dress clothes to look professional?

This is just some basic food for thought, because everyone may not be prepared, although we have very little time left, some of us who are getting ready to graduate can prepare for life's next step.....

Reneta Alasha

RELATIONSHIPS...

So when men and women all get together in a room,  the topic is going to come up, we are going to always argue and debate. Relationships, this can be a serious topic and people have their own opinions on relationships.  Personally I love this topic, because I find it interesting to listen to what men have to say as they defend themselves. It is also interesting to me to listen to how women argue or get on the defense about relationships.

Not too long ago I was hit with a curve ball, or a young man said something to me I was not prepared to hear. We are going to call him the ex- factor. He and I dated about four years ago, he is a smart man, and has a degree. Sometime we still hold on to the past, when we should have moved on a long time ago. Well anyway he and I were texting, and we were talking about if we would possibly ever get back together.  So he says to me in a text message, "You have traveled the world and done things I could never imagine, I know you are long gone, and I know you are a totally different person than who you were when we first met; personally I do not believe I can match up to dating someone like you who has done as much as you."  WHAT????????? I could not believe he sent this in a text.  Now he is a couple of years older than me, but at first I thought he was making up a lame excuse.  

After this text message I thought to myself OK he is whack! But as I began to think this was the thought that came to mind: Are men intimidated by strong successful African American women? Are men scared to date women who are educated, are they scared to date women who have more degrees than they do? What does this mean for possible relationships? Will a guy date me if I have a doctorate, and he has a bachelors? Is there any potential there in that relationship?  

Do we all set standards too high as educated people, when it comes to relationships?  Are men really scared of women who are very educated, or does this not affect them?

Allow Me To INTRODUCE myself

It would only be right if  I introduced myself and talked about who I am.. I am twenty- one years old, and I am a college student. I attend a HBCU that is all Women, which is known as Bennett College.. I have matured and grown so much as a woman while I have been in college. I am an only child and I have two great christian loving parents. I have seen so much in this lifetime I would never trade it for the world. This summer I had the opportunity to study in 3 countries in Africa; Ghana, Tanzania, and South Africa. Africa is beautiful I will talk about it eventually. (that is another blog for another day) 

 Currently I am SINGLE, not prepared to jump in a relationship I am unprepared for. (LOL) I have an addiction to fashion and clothes, but every once in a while I do not mind partying with my friends. 

 I hate small minded people, and men who have nothing going for themselves; I dislike women who are jealous and judgmental. Personally I think everyone should live there lives and stop dick ridding others... SO I bring to you all the tales of a twenti-something year old African-American / Native American young lady and her trials on this earth...............